Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Relationship Injustice Part 5

If 2006 was supposed to be the year of tragedy, failure, and sadness amongst myself and those around me, then 2007 is shaping up to be the year of unrequited love. HORDES of my close friends have, like me recently, been confronted with the realization that the love of his/her life is not going to be the person that he/she spends life with. These days, everyone around me has a strong, enduring passion and hope for that one person they want forever, but are either moving on or otherwise bound to someone else. I may have mentioned it before (I'm too lazy to do the research) but THESE are soul mates. People you never marry or whatever, but still you ache for, think of, and subsequently all their character to define your own spiritual nature. In a spiritual world, surely the bond with your "#1" is ideal and predestined. But unfortunately the defects of human nature, selfishness, and "sin" intercede and preclude such an idealistic bond in our pesticide-ridden planet. Fear not, as some ancient religious disciplines (those that correctly define "soul mate") do acknowledge that in the world beyond, you will be with your "#1".

Point taken, before you silently protest: there are classic cases of the dopey Nebraska boy marrying his high school sweetheart and with ignorance being bliss, they make lots of babies and live happily ever after. That's a great thing to hear of, know of, and be aware of. It, however, further illustrates the tendency of the complicated world, such as urban life, to taint honest relationships and create those divisions which separate such aforementioned sweethearts. The situation in which high school sweethearts marry and live together forever? Mostly happens in rural areas, less likely to be spoiled by the ills of modern society. Don't get upset, country boys, but those areas are a bit of a throwback to a simpler time. I recall an episode of MASH (set in Korea) asked the snobby Major Winchester what time it was in Iowa. He answered "1882". Fairly accurate, but not, in my mindset, in a demeaning way. Simple is best, and clearly the most accommodating environment for fostering natural relationships that are clearly meant to be.

What plainly stinks about ultimately being paired with that "#1" person is the fact that there is little one can do in the big city. Too many other people get in the way, other people intercede, yet others pose temptation for infidelity, and the natural bond that was once meant to exist and prove itself true and unblemished is suddenly tarnished, dented, bruised, tested, and contorted. That's why there are far fewer love stories of high school sweethearts seeing things through and marrying in the context of the big city. Out in farm country, the high school sweethearts always end up married and productive, as there is little to harm its progress. Ignorance is bliss, in a sense. Place a similar rural couple in an urban environment and I'd give their relationship two months at the most.

It's basically an anthropological fact that humans need connection with nature, and when in urban environments, humans lose their natural sense of, well, being human. Perhaps in the city, all couples are doomed to implosion with the various rigors therein. Such issues might account for the ridiculous divorce rate amongst national statistics.

I've seen countless relationships blossom into marriage from within the city. What did each couple do as a result? Moved away into the distant suburbs. As such, they're all fine. I'm elated for each couple that is smart enough to remove themselves from the fray of the city and relocate to distant regions. I am similarly saddened by the doom and overwhelmingly negative odds imposed upon a strong relationship that must endure the urban temptations and emotional dissatisfaction a complex, unnatural environment of a city may impose. In the end, nothing ever seems to have a happy ending within the context of the city. Just run away and find someone that is unaffected by the ills of the urban world.

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